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Divorce Absolute

By Deb Bunt

A Dear ArsŤne, rather than John, letter

I fell in love with you in 1971, when I was just ten years old. You were local and you'd been around for a while. Yes, you were a bit rough and had a reputation as being craggy, uncompromising, perhaps even lucky. But for some reason I fell totally and utterly in love with you, absorbing and accepting your faults until they became virtues. You came to me with twins and, young as I was, I took them on, too.

Itís overÖ

Our relationship was cemented in the '70s. What fun we had. From Southampton to Sunderland, we sauntered up and down the country; we sang; we danced; we cried. But we stayed together, an instinctive realisation that the fit was perfect.

Yes, of course, you were stubborn and dined for too long on those past glories, but I was dazzled by you. There was a tacit understanding that you would be there for me. My expectations were low, but I was happy just to be with you. In 1979 you gave me my first child.

It was dour in the early eighties, and we tiptoed around the rocky patches, occasionally stumbling, but rising together, shackled by a love which endured. I knew that, whatever your faults, I would always get commitment, character and fidelity. No one could ever accuse you of being spineless.

In 1987, our next child was born, conceived from toil and love and, to be brutally frank, something of a surprise to everyone around us.

The climatic thrill in 1989 and the memory of that day in Liverpool will always bring tears to my eyes. I cut myself off from friends and family, preferring to be with you because you were unpredictable, moody, impetuous, exciting and frustrating. Sometimes you were simply the best.

1991 saw us romp through the year, wallowing wonderfully in all but perfection. I thought things would never get better; we had another child and, although the early nineties were dull - perhaps you were going through your own crises; I should have asked - I was still infatuated. We had created something special and 1993 and 1994 were a reminder of the great things we could still achieve together.

And so to our peak years. First the twins (1998 and 2002); then, sadly some miscarriages, and then the little one in 2003. Passion and fidelity rewarded amply. Of course, in 2004 you were brilliant. Strong, determined, some would say invincible. Others tried to come between us but you remained untouchable, showing the rest how it could be done. With style and class, with finesse and joy.

Although you started to change in 2005, there was still a flame burning brightly because I accepted that you were going through your own transitional phase, and I stood by you because, whatever your faults, you were never gutless and true love cannot be allowed to burn out meekly. You owned up to your weaknesses and they became mildly endearing (although, it must be said, somewhat predictable).

But now we've drifted apart. It had been coming. I stayed with you for the sake of the children. My friends urged me to dump you; they could see that you'd changed beyond recognition, that I was never going to get the old you back. Overwhelmed by a blind, gnawing and needy love for you, I ignored them. Of course, you still gave me some good times, I can't deny it, but these were one-off moments, fleeting pleasures which flickered and then died when the old you sauntered back.

And now? My, how you changed. You started to sell your soul, to pimp yourself to the highest bidder, to be flattered by expensive suitors who pandered to your failing ego. Piece by piece, you left me and the shell I am left with is simply not enough. I don't expect perfection - of course not. After all, we are neither of us in the first flush of youth. But I can't cope with your cavalier attitude. Your laissez-faire approach. I can't cope with your old ways when the world has moved on. You cannot do the things you used to do, so donít even try. Itís embarrassing and pathetic. Everyone is laughing at you. Donít you see it? Your old rivals have adapted to life in 2012, so why canít you?

Do you know what? I was going to ditch you in September, 2012. Truly I was. And in November, 2012, when I thought my resolve was firm, you lured me back with a wild party against our noisy neighbours. You promised me you had changed, that I would see the real you again. Ahhhh, you promised me so much. You lured me to Birmingham and I went up to meet you; I stood for 90 minutes in the rain and wind waiting for you. But you never came. I am aching inside. November 24th is the day that I shed tears for you - they prickled and blistered my raw cheeks as they fell.

I will always love you; I will hoard those special memories. But I can't be with you any more. It's for my own sanity and health. Emotional abuse begins to take its toll. The children are old and donít need us. And I don't need you. I just don't like the whimpering, jellied, placid, amoeba-like blob you've become. You blame everyone else for your failings. Now I realise that it's not me. Itís you. Arsenal, I am leaving you. I just don't like what you've become.

4th December 2012

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User Comment and Reaction

User comments on this article are now closed. If you want to continue the debate, why not do so on the Gooner Forum.

Esso  9:03am 4th Dec 2012

On your way then. - Post No. 31648


phil  9:04am 4th Dec 2012

bye then - Post No. 31649


Rickthegooner  9:05am 4th Dec 2012

Wow You really are a "true' gooner. Through thick and thin !!!!! Sounds to me like you need a backbone, not the club. Enjoy your Saturday's washing your hair. You won't be missed. - Post No. 31650


Mark Rice  9:18am 4th Dec 2012

I was trying to think of something whitty to say in response, but I can't it's all just too depressing at the moment and it's going to get worse when he plays the kids at Bradford and we tumble out of what is our only hope of silver wear this season ..... Groan - Post No. 31651


Canterbury Gooner  9:21am 4th Dec 2012

Sorry but if you're just saying you don't support the club anymore you don't need to announce it in such a creepy manner. Real fans can't quit the club- the love is unconditional. - Post No. 31653


Jack  9:58am 4th Dec 2012

Surely the writers just a glory hunter. Like so many they start following Arsenal after a triumph in this case the double.I became an Arsenal fan in 1975 just after we had finished 16th. If it's purely about the way the club is run,then what you are saying is you want Arsenal to be like Citeh,Manure and the Chavs and just buy trophies which any true Arsenal fan should detest. Is it really that tough following Arsenal even when Arsenal are at their worst they were still better than 90% of the other teams to watch. The Hornbyesque it's so difficult and I am so loyal to follow Arsenal is ridiculous,It's easy following The Arsenal. Having to travel up and down the country to watch Stoke West Ham or Sunderland,now that would be hard. It all boils down to the fact that Arsenal are struggling and the WOB's don't have the backbone to handle it. Listening to them weep to the oh so pleased Adrian Durham last night on talk sport was so amusing. At least a couple Wenger supporters rang in to put them straight,even though as usual they were not listened to. As I have said before the media has an agenda they want Usmanov in and they use the weak Wob's and people like Stewat Robson,Piers Morgan,Frank Mclintock and talk sport in particular to achieve their aims. How often do you hear these people say."I feel sorry for the Arsenal fans," and many Arsenal fans fall right into their trap. As my grandad would say "Up the Gunners". - Post No. 31656


John Gooner  10:02am 4th Dec 2012

After 40 years of following the club, can't you see that it stands for so much more than the idiots we have in charge at the moment. Even if it takes bankruptcy to remove the scum in charge of the club, I will support Arsenal from the lowest league. I'm not sure if you're saying that you will be ditching Arsenal for life, or just no longer attending matches under the current regime. If it's the latter then fair enough; if it's the former then shame on you. - Post No. 31657


Nutty's Right Peg  10:06am 4th Dec 2012

Very clever piece Deb, just prepare yourself for the predictable "good riddence", or "f*** off to T*******m" jibes from those who can't see the wood for the trees. - Post No. 31658


AFC14  10:26am 4th Dec 2012

Hard times yes,but I will NEVER divorce Arsenal. - Post No. 31662


Graham Simons  10:31am 4th Dec 2012

geez - get a grip and the reference to miscarriages was crass to say the very least. Shankly was wrong football isn't a matter of life and death. Suck it up and support the club. I go running in my old shirts - whenever I go through Holloway I usually get a reaction from fellow Gooners and it makes me proud to be a Gooner. We're having a tough time at the moment but things could be worse! - Post No. 31664


Nilesh Bhagat  10:35am 4th Dec 2012

"Marriages fail because partners canít find a solution to the nagging issues many couples face. The most common issues include poor communication, financial problems, a lack of commitment to the marriage, a dramatic change in priorities, and infidelity." Or as Iris Murdoch put it, ďFalling out of love is chiefly a matter of forgetting how charming someone is.Ē - Post No. 31665


Bono  10:42am 4th Dec 2012

I hope you find what you are looking for. - Post No. 31666


Supernova  11:11am 4th Dec 2012

Well said! Love "I just don't like the whimpering, jellied, placid, amoeba-like blob you've become. You blame everyone else for your failings. Now I realise that it's not me. Itís you. Arsenal, I am leaving you. I just don't like what you've become." LOL - Post No. 31668


mark from aylesbury  11:16am 4th Dec 2012

Jack, when you are effectively attacking Frank the legend Mcclintock as part of your pro Wenger arguament. Do you support Arsenal or Arsene? Id take Franks views over Arsenes any day of the week - Post No. 31669


mike  11:40am 4th Dec 2012

don't forget your hat, we don't want you to have an excuse to come back - Post No. 31672


Chris  11:58am 4th Dec 2012

Perhaps a better title would have been 'Confessions of a glory hunting Gooner'? Or some reference to the seven year itch - it was fortunate that the FA Cup came to the rescue in 1979 whilst this time, the cupboard has remained bare. - Post No. 31673


In Arsene We Trust  12:11pm 4th Dec 2012

I usually criticise articles like these at onlinegooner, but you know what I like it. People like these who stop supporting the club and Wenger should just leave and let us true Arsenal fans support them. Good riddance I say. It's articles like these that will determine which are the true fans who will support the club through thick and thin and which ones are the plastic fans/glory hunters. I hear spurs will welcome you lot with open arms, hell, they have already brought some of our rejects like Gallas, Adebayor and Bentley to their club. - Post No. 31676


Ron  12:14pm 4th Dec 2012

Good grief! Mind you dont meet a new love on the rebound, it could be Tottenham! Take time out to reflect and recover your desire and mental strength and to give absolutely everything to your new life. Im sure you have the talent, resiliance and commitment still in there somewhere. Maybe you should have stuck together in these difficult times after all youve managed things for 41 years, so dont be judged by others who know not what they do or say. Im sure youve no intention of walking away really. At least judge your relationship in May. It could be one or two super, super things might happen by then. - Post No. 31677


jjetplane  12:20pm 4th Dec 2012

Bring on the settlement! Judging by Wenger's now total paranoia (earning that f...... much!) - its gonna be some drama. Probably just zip the sleeping bag full up and fall asleep during one of the next itchy encounters. Prediction says Wenger will be retired for xmas and Bouldie will hold fort till Denis is ready to return - with Tony of course. See! Be positive! Deb - not quite Fever Pitch but that creative writing course has done wonders. - Post No. 31678


A Doctor Writes  12:28pm 4th Dec 2012

I have carefully read the history in this case and it seems to me that the underlying cause of your dissatisfaction in the relationship is that your partner no longer has the ability to fully satisfy you. However, erectile dysfun.ction is rarely permanent in such cases and can usually be treated successfully by regular injections or radical surgery to remove any obstruction in the relevant organ. - Post No. 31680


TCP  12:48pm 4th Dec 2012

Can you hear me ? I'm playing the world's smallest violin in sympathy for you. Quite frankly this article, albeit framed as a pastiche, is laughable for the wrong reasons. Get some perspective, it's a game FFS. If you don't enjoy watching the Arsenal at present, don't go to the game, but don't bin off the Team and claim to be heartbroken about it. Those are crocodile tears you're crying. - Post No. 31681


Tony Evans  13:00pm 4th Dec 2012

I thought you would come in for some stick for your article but I know exactly where you are coming from on this. I started supporting Arsenal at the start of the double season 70/71 and have had some great and plenty of not so great times with them. This is obviously one of the not so great (and has been for a while now) but somehow it is different isn't it - I just don't have sufficient will power, energy, call it what you want to devote my time and emotion to what that clown Wenger has created and you obviously feel the same. I am sure you will rediscover your love affair with Arsenal once the French prat has gone and taken most of his powder-puff team with him. - Post No. 31684


Arsene just go NOW  13:04pm 4th Dec 2012

Predictable responses from the AKB's.I will always support Arsenal FC but i hate Arsene FC.I have had enough of our £7m a year manager taking the piss out of us.Anyone who still thinks Arsenal are still a football club you really are deluded.All Arsenal stand for is Profits.But the AKB's still cant see it.We sold our sold to some bloke in Denver who comes over once a year to check the books.I will not support Arsene F C - Post No. 31685


UltrArsenal  13:25pm 4th Dec 2012

Im as anti board and anti Wenger as they come. But what the hell is this drivel? Doesn't mean you stop supporting Arsenal. Like one guy said, enjoy your Saturday nights washing your hair. - Post No. 31687


CanadaGooner  13:49pm 4th Dec 2012

it is rather amazing how many illiterates claim to be arsenal fans (i used to think that was a chelsea thing). only an illiterate will carry on with these 'AKB' or 'WOB' babble: if you are an arsenal fan, you are an arsenal fan pronto! you can express an opinion for or against the team, management, board or the color of the sky during the last game; or whatever you wish to express an opinion about. People can agree or disagree (it's a free world); but those who come on here just to label others as 'AKBs' or 'WOBs' or whatever other fanciful acronymn are simply illiterates and are simply a minority as i have been going to the games for over 30 years now and majority of the fans i have sat next to over the years have been very intelligent, literate and i wish those folks can join the onlinegooner forum so we can move away from what we currently have, which is a majority of illiterates who only seek a cowardly outlet for their anger or issues elsewhere. Arsenal as a club needs a change; there isnt any other way to look at it. for years we wondered who could replace wenger; now there are a few credible managers out there (e.g. Pep Guardiola) but the unfortunate circumstances are that such managers may struggle to please a board that is used to having a golden donkey (wenger) who transformed from a winning-manager to a money-making machine eitherway, let's put the club first; continue to give 100% support and have less of these self-centred rubbish about 'divorce' or 'protesting mid-season' and all those counter-productive crap that usually indicates a high level of illiteracy! - Post No. 31689


Colin  14:06pm 4th Dec 2012

Very good and honest article.I started supporting Arsenal in 1969 the year we lost a cup final to a third division team so dont call me a glory hunter.I was there in the mid 70's and the early 80's when gates were down to 15,000.I was there in the days of Mancini and Blockley and Jensen and Hillier.But i had pride in my club.I have now come to the point when i dont care if Wengers team of overpaid pussies win or lose.Who in our lifetimes ever thought we would see an Arsenal team concede eight goals in a game.That is the moment any manager who cared about the club and its fans would have resigned in shame.But Wenger has no shame and the slow torture continues.We used to be a football club now we are no different to MacDonalds and Tesco's a business.And the sooner the mad followers of Wenger realise this the better.Some of the replies from the AKB's show them for what they really are sheep - Post No. 31691


Red Mist  14:10pm 4th Dec 2012

Haha you would think the Wenger lovers would have a sense of humour! But from the comments above he took that as well. - Post No. 31692


Wind of Change  14:11pm 4th Dec 2012

I'm sick of these sleepwalker fans at the club who can't see anything wrong. The whole club is starting to smell. The board are old and are brainwashed by advisors (whether that be IG, AW, AKB's or whoever) that it's all about the money. We have an owner who is watching the cash mountain building up and in the last year we must have taken on Colonel Gaddafi's PR team as we have been spun so much rubbish. So the club are currently doing the following.......charge at least £1,000 for a season ticket, charge nearly £50 a season so silver members can get some sort of right to buy tickets (effectively creating a market out of nothing), charging £100 tickets for so called Category A games.... and now to top it all off, there I was going for a p*** in the urinal at half time on Saturday and above me was a poster with a Christmas decoration ribbon on it with the following words "Support your club - buy merchandise direct from Arsenal".... So there you go, they said it, they don't want your vocal support, they don't want a football team to make you proud, they don't want your allegiance for life....No... they just want your cash. That is why a lot of people are angry... A lot of us realise we have no right to win silverware every year but treating your loyal support as just a means to get cash is damm right criminal. We used to be a football club. Now we're a symbol of corporate power. Football doesn't matter at Arsenal now. - Post No. 31693


maguiresbridge gooner  14:15pm 4th Dec 2012

I get the jist Deb but it's not as simple as that.We will never leave and always standby and love OUR ARSENAL not the custodians who have come and gone, and have come again, and we'll still be here to pick up the pieces of our relationship when THEY'VE all gone. - Post No. 31694


Chris  14:16pm 4th Dec 2012

@Tony Evans - I'm sorry, despite my views being very different to your own I am usually completely tolerant and don't mind reading them. However, my I politely ask - who the f*ck are you to call Wenger a clown? Forgive me if your own achievements in life outweigh his, but such are the vagaries of anonymity on the internet. May I also suggest that it might fell 'different this time' at least partly because, well, anyone who has been supporting Arsenal since 1970 must be getting on a bit... - Post No. 31695


Sandra  14:21pm 4th Dec 2012

I have been going to watch Arsenal since 1983. In that time there have been many many highs and many many lows too - that's what happens in football. Things are not great but I have seen worse. My love for ARSENAL is unconditional! - Post No. 31696


Nick  14:31pm 4th Dec 2012

To Jack and In arsene we trust , i do believe you both are more supporters of Wenger than the Arsenal , to criticize Frank Mclintock for wanting change is absurd he was probably the best captain this club ever had on a par with Joe Mercer and Tony at least, and jack if you want to get into an argument about longevity of support , well ive been a supporter since 58 when i was 5 years old and my whole family right back to the 20s, but in my view while not wholly irrelavent it isnt the point, a gooner is a gooner so long as they support the CLUB and not just blindly and scyophanticly follow Arsene, because if you simply support Wenger wtf will you do when he retires, we are all entitled to our opinion and for the record mine is this, based on tactics inc subs, and trophys won over the last 7 years, general demeanour and handling of critique, and the wage bill and poor signings during this time, then it has to be said that if the club itself ASPIRES to win things then the man has FAILED!!! - Post No. 31697


Big Andy  15:20pm 4th Dec 2012

A true fan would never desert the club. We are going through a bad patch right now, but sooner or later things will change. This article confuses Arsenal with Arsene. Wenger's time is up, and we all know it, but Arsenal Football Club is for ever. The one point that should be made is that under Kroenke the club has moved further away from its fans, blatantly lying to us while milking us for every penny that they can get - that has been disgusting. But sooner or later the Yank will be gone too. I can't wait. - Post No. 31698


Dandy Mod  15:26pm 4th Dec 2012

Encapsulating piece. Am I to eluciditate from this that Mandy is finally turning. Wenger's fan club is diminishing too. The laws of nature dictate this. It stands to reason that admirers are falling by the wayside. Wenger is most certainly not gaining acolytes any longer. You all know it. To quote GoonerGoal 'viva la revolucion'. - Post No. 31699


RJ  15:51pm 4th Dec 2012

Well I thought this was a much better read than most of the miserable AMG groundhog articles on here - at least the doom and gloom is written with some style. I particualrly like the "jellied... blob" reference. Are you talking about Arshavin? Thing is, football clubs are longer-term relationships than most marriages - can't imagine I will ever leave my wife, but i will certainly never stop supporting Arsenal, and cannot bring myself to boo the team. Yes, Arsene's time does look like it should be up, but I will never ever boo my own boys, and I will never walk away. - Post No. 31700


GG89  15:53pm 4th Dec 2012

The grass is not always greener on the other side... call it a seperation.... dont file for divorce just yet... Who knows, wenger might move on and the new guy sells the dead wood... it just may not happen soon.... Please stop giving the club more money... they'll only change if it financially suits them.... dont go to the games,, dont be silly. You wouldn't go back to the same restaurant if the foods bad or would you... Loyal is loyal not stupid... I still want them to do the triple this season... - Post No. 31701


N16Gooner  16:20pm 4th Dec 2012

Well said Deb, Enoughs enough Arsene sling your hook and take your brain washed cult members with you. IN ARSENE WE RUST. - Post No. 31702


tfSmudge  16:26pm 4th Dec 2012

Ha, I'm sure you don't mean that rubbish Deb... It's a sad period we're going through, and it's lasted years not weeks. There's only one man that can bring back the big players to Arsenal. In September 1991 he helped Arsenal sign Ian Wright from Crystal Palace for £2.5 million. In June 1995 he flew to Milan ďand returned with the signature of, for the first time in Arsenalís history, a true international superstarĒ Arsenal bought Dutch International Dennis Bergkamp for £7.5 million from Internazionale. Over the following years he was also responsible for recruiting players such as Patrick Vieira, Emmanuel Petit, Marc Overmars, Thierry Henry, Davor Suker, Robert Pires, Sol Campbell, Gilberto, Gael Clichy, Kolo Toure, Cesc Fabregas and Robin Van Persie. On 18 April 2007, amazingly, it was revealed by Arsenal that he had left the club with immediate effect after "irreconcilable differences" between himself and the rest of the board. Who is this man then ? Well the real Mr Arsenal and forgotten hero David Dein. Gazidis replaced him and we've won nothing since. The facts speak for themselves. Reinstate him now with a full pardon from the board. Never mind the bollox... - Post No. 31703


Guy in Jersey  16:36pm 4th Dec 2012

Deb, ignore the knee-jerk, sexist, ignorant morons who can't appreciate the thought that's gone into this piece. As a fan for over 40 years, you've earned the right to put up two fingers to anyone who criticizes you for expressing an opinion. I could say more, but it would be wasted on some of the tossers who support the same team that we do. - Post No. 31704


why?  17:03pm 4th Dec 2012

What the Hell is this crap?? You cant just fall in and out of love with a football team! Yes i agree we're pants at the moment, but these things go round in cycles. F*****g 'man' up!! Through thick and thin. Lightweight. - Post No. 31706


Stroud Green Road Boy  17:40pm 4th Dec 2012

@In Arsene We Trust, I've noticed you've been moaning recently about people attacking you. The reason why is you seem unable to distinguish between supporting Arsenal and supporting Arsene. It is possible you know, to support Arsenal FC the institution whilst still wanting a change of the current manager or board or owner (or all three). Until you recognise that there is a distinction then people are going to continue to react to your one dimensional comments accusing them of not being Arsenal fans because they are not Arsene fans. Learn to distinguish, even whilst defending Wenger if that's what you believe. - Post No. 31707


Vince  18:17pm 4th Dec 2012

Clever article and given the reference to particular times in our history this is written by someone who has been a true supporter. - Post No. 31708


Dartford Gooner  18:29pm 4th Dec 2012

Jack, hang your head in shame. I met Frank Mclintock at the recent Dover Gooners dinner, how you can put him together with that clown Durham shows how little you now of the great man and his role in our history. The captain of our double winning team pays to get into home matches. I spent some time talking with Frank and if you doubt his love of Arsenal you know nothing of the man or Arsenal - Post No. 31709


Gooner1711  18:42pm 4th Dec 2012

Each to there own and I do totally understand. The spouting of rubbish above just goes to show how many people are still happy with how it is at AFC. As they are happy then nothing will change, but there is a gowing groundswill who are now totally fed up. 8 years will be come 10+ if it continues. - Post No. 31710


SelsdonRed  18:44pm 4th Dec 2012

A very well-written piece which a lot of people seem to have missed the point. I for one don't doubt that deb will continue to support arsenal just as much as she has done in the past... How many of the "get lost then" brigade went to the villa match? - Post No. 31711


Dr Walker  18:50pm 4th Dec 2012

I first became an Arsenal fan in 1967. 29 years before Wenger joined.We need to get things straight we are Arsenal football club not Arsene FC est 1996.You cant have a decent arguement with the AKB's on here because they will never admit their leader is wrong.They live in their own Wengerworld where the last 7 years didnt happen.We are still in 2004.You get idiots like Jack,Chris and In Arsene We Trust whose only reply to criticism of Wenger is to abuse the poster like little kids .This is our worst start to a season for 30 years the manager is tactically clueless.But if you say that you are called a glory hunter and to f**k off down the Lane.I am not a glory hunter i am a Gooner and i want Wenger out of my club now - Post No. 31713


RipRoaringRed  19:06pm 4th Dec 2012

Oi CanadaGooner! Dont call us illiterurt just because we read the Sun and dont agree wiv wot sum Frasier luvin bagel munchin Gaurdian reader finks. We can speak just as good Inglish as what you can, our quid buys just as much as yurs at the home of football, and our voices and harts at the Arsenal are wurf as much yours. So why donít you just do one? - Post No. 31715


Just 15 points behind RVP  19:09pm 4th Dec 2012

@Nick a brilliant post sums up what a lot of us Gooners think.But watch out you will be told you are not a real supporter.You are supposed to bend over and take the **** Wenger and the board our giving us while forking out a grand for a season ticket without a peep.Some of our so called fans need to wake up and smell the coffee we are no longer a big club anymore.Wenger has seen to that.We are living on past glories.Wenger should have left 4 years ago with his head held high now he will leave out the back door.As for some of our so called fans having a go at the great Frank McLintock hold your heads in shame and take a history lesson.Frank loves Arsenal but he wont be a yes man for Wengers management - Post No. 31716


ppp  19:15pm 4th Dec 2012

Whoever wrote this article is truly, truly pathetic and I hope they're serious about going away and not coming back. Fans like these idiots have made tough times fare more difficult to bear. The anti-Arsenal set should ship out en-masse and leave the real fans to get behind the players and help them find their form. The online-gooner needs to take a look at itself and ask the question - have we made things worse for Arsenal? What can we do to help the players instead of making them feel unwanted. - Post No. 31717


CanadaGooner  19:32pm 4th Dec 2012

@RipRoaringRed; i wont trade insults with you mate; keep supporting and loving arsenal; if you're literate enough to read what i wrote and write back you can be an illiterate, but telling me to 'do one' isnt that clever. if you disagree with what i said, fair enough. arsenal fans need to come together (regardless of opinions); wenger will leave at some point (sooner or later) but the club will remain. - Post No. 31718


maguiresbridge gooner  19:36pm 4th Dec 2012

Dartford Gooner well said, i've met Frank myself more than once, true legend it's just a pity we hadn't a couple like him on the team today instead of some of the pussies we have.So called fans of today slagging him off and disrespecting him probably know nothing about him and wouldn't recognise or know who he was if he was standing in front of them. - Post No. 31719


Ronster  19:36pm 4th Dec 2012

Frank McLintock earnt the grand total of £90,000 in his ENTIRE 20 year career....£10,000 less than Walcott wants to leech each week from the club....show us your medals Feo! - Post No. 31720


Harry K  20:00pm 4th Dec 2012

I think your missing the point.. She never said it was about the trophies but about whats happening to our team and how they have let her down and how it hurts. I bet she wont be able to leave them when it comes to it and i think how she feels comes across even if its a bit arty. I can feel her pain and weve all be there for the last few years. - Post No. 31721


stegun  20:30pm 4th Dec 2012

It's true. All of it. But even the writer will be back for more. You can't leave the love of your life no matter how bad it gets. You think you will until it comes to walk out the door and then you turn and give them another last chance. Again! - Post No. 31722


LJB  21:13pm 4th Dec 2012

Deb,please don't let the current malaise at the club stop you supporting Arsenal.Things WILL change,may take a while,but they will,they have to.Wenger will eventually go,Kroenke will sell and PHW and the old etonian gang will eventually be too doddery to continue.Gazidis will probably end up running UEFA;being CEO of Arsenal is definately not the height of his ambitions.To all those criticising Deb,have YOU been Gooners since 1970? I bet you only know the Wenger years.If she were a glory hunter( what is football about if not glory? Why do we bother having points and leagues and cups if winning is not important?) she would have left long ago.It makes me sad that this regime is loosing the club long term fans. - Post No. 31723


Deb  21:56pm 4th Dec 2012

@LJB - thanks! Midst the torrents of abuse I've shouldered today, your words have made me feel slightly better. I was trying to write from the heart. Arsenal have absorbed me for 41 years - I even planned my wedding in the close season. Everyone who knows me defines me primarily as an Arsenal fan. Perhaps as has been suggested it will be a trial separation or just a platonic relationship. Either way, I need to protect myself from my feelings of despair and pain. - Post No. 31726


Mark  22:06pm 4th Dec 2012

@Dr Walker i agree with ever word you say.Written with passion - Post No. 31727


Dannyboy  22:42pm 4th Dec 2012

Wow, reading back the comments and wondering what happened to everyone's seeming inability to understand irony . I'm fairly sure this is a joke but I can see how some of you might have struggled because it contains words of more than one syllable. - Post No. 31728


Robbie  22:42pm 4th Dec 2012

You speak a lot of sense Deb.I'm glad you have come to your senses.I would never let my wife anywhere near The Arsenal. There's plenty for her to be crackin on with at home. - Post No. 31729


Salvage  23:00pm 4th Dec 2012

The writer was taking a journey with the Arsenal from the good to the bad times. I am sure anyone who has been a supporter that long, would not just divorce the club. Its just a style of writing and expression. To show at the level we are at right now. Take a breather guys.. - Post No. 31731


Jason b.  0:03am 5th Dec 2012

Dry your eyes love.do me a favour,leave your season ticket to someone more deserving.cancel your membership.perhaps you could then return to housework or otherwise.talk to a Samaritan.choose another team,but whatever you choose,don't come back to the arsenal. - Post No. 31732


anthony walters  0:07am 5th Dec 2012

sorry mate we all have disappointments but put yourself in the shoes of leeds , forest,wolves,sheffield wednesday or even villa fans. all glorious clubs of the past and compare us to them. then theres the fans of the minnows .remember we,re set up for the future brilliantly .a great new stadium and liverpool,everton,chelsea and spurs all to build theres.stop being pathetic and go if that,s how you feel .wenger has lead us through the stadium building superbly though i don,t believe we,ll win another league title under him and even if he had the money i don,t think he could win the champs league. - Post No. 31733


martin wengrow  0:37am 5th Dec 2012

Once again, can you get this brilliant piece to the powers that be at our ailing club. - Post No. 31735


Mandy Dodd  0:42am 5th Dec 2012

No dandy, Mandy is not for turning and will forever support this club as I have done through thick and thin, with trophies and without trophies...and I have been around long enough to know wenger has helped put us in a much better place than when he arrived. - Post No. 31736


wrag  1:03am 5th Dec 2012

i tend to agree with the writer ,i thinks its not that they have stopped supporting arsenal, but like myself have just given up on any real chance of anything going right again under wenger. i really wanna know how the board would react if we dont get 4th place ? what lines wenger will spill,if indeed he even stays (f#@k off) . the people i truly feel for are the "unclean" or AKB gang ,for years they have been soiled by his lies and optimism . but im sad to say ,even arsenal is inked in my skin ,ive given up ...on a high note im so excited to annouce we are gonna get a chelsea reject ..no not frank ..but the great kalou !rofl - Post No. 31737


In Arsene We Trust  1:08am 5th Dec 2012

@Nick and to any anti-Wenger member: "you just support Wenger and not the club..." blah, blah and blah.... typical nonsense from the anti-Wenger brigade. if you actually look at the abuse a lot of you WOB throwing at Wenger, you wouldn't question why we are backing Arsene. Back when George Graham, even though he was inferior to Wenger, but that was before Arsene's time at Arsenal, I supported him and didn't throw abuse at him like many of you WOB throwing at Wenger. The main reason why I'm backing Arsene, it's because you WOB demands ridiculous request like bring in overrated Guardiola or idiot like Mourinho to replace Arsene, even though they have spent so much on one season that will put Arsenal in further debt or spend on £30 to £50 million on a player like we are Chelsea or Man City. Maybe because you armchair managers/plastic fans think that Wenger's job is so easy because you played FIFA football. Well, the fact is, it's not. If you people look at the facts and get some common sense instead of being so delusional and looking for short term success, maybe you'll see that. @Stroud Green Road Boy: while I disagree with you lot, doesn't give me the right to hurl abuse and tell you people to "f*** off" like a certain individual did with me. I suppose you'll look the other way because you agree with this person that you want Wenger gone. I shouldn't be surprise, as even the website admins here are doing the same thing. - Post No. 31738


Gare Kekeke  3:28am 5th Dec 2012

Deb, donít ever give up on The Arsenal. Yes, things arenít great right now but keep supporting the club. Whether it would be Wenger (which I really doubt) or another manager, The Arsenal will rise again. I see Frank McLintock has taken a bit of a bashing here. Wrongly in my book. In my line of work, I come across many ex-footballers, some of whom who used to play for The Arsenal. Just last night, I was sharing a joke with Charlie Nicholas (Arsenal fans under the age of 26, look up the 1987 League Cup final on YouTube. I even personally thanked the man at a work party in 2001) in the car park. He commented on how cold it was and noticed me not wearing a coat. I jokingly responded that with him being an ex-pro and Scottish he should be used to it! back to McLintock, like a few of the posters to the article, I too have met Frank a few times and he is a proper Gooner who lives and breathes The Arsenal so all fans young and old (me being a Gooner since January 1987 two months before I turned seven) should always respect the man as he is a true legend of The Arsenal. McLintockís performances and achievements for our great club (not the boardís affairs according to Peter Hill-Wood) make a mockery of some of the current players at The Arsenal who are perceived as Ďlegendsí. Koscielny is decent but not fit to tie his shoelaces and Walcott will never reach the iconic status of our 1971 Ďdoubleí winning captain. Great comments too from CanadaGooner, Nick & Dr Walker, all of which amongst many similar others I 100% agree with. Up The Arsenal! - Post No. 31739


Ali  4:42am 5th Dec 2012

Arsenal is possessed by evil spirits (Wenger, Satan, Gazadis). It is now up to the fans to rescue it. - Post No. 31740


Tony Evans  8:21am 5th Dec 2012

Chris - We certainly disagree when it comes to Wenger and if his daft comments don't make you think he is a clown then good for you. There used to be a contributor to this website called 'Taxi for Wenger' who should rename him or herself 'Straitjacket for Wenger' because he is certifiable and how 'fans' like you can keep swallowing his deluded bull is beyond me. - Post No. 31753


RJI  8:28am 5th Dec 2012

Yawn...dunno whats worse...the way the team is playing or the the content here in past few weeks?? terrible - Post No. 31754


Deb  9:31am 5th Dec 2012

In the same way that hair washing is deemed a female characteristic, I'd like to try to have the last word. Clearly I hit a chord with many of you. All I ask you to do is to think about how much time you would invest in a failing relationship before you quit. Following a team has always been compared to having an intense and personal reltionship. Football Football/Arsenal is no different from life and you are deluded and naive if you think so. Would you stay in a relationship that was consuming your soul and causing nothing but pain? Would you let your partner lie to you and ridicule you and still give them your money? Love is enduring but you can simply stop liking someone who has changed beyond recognition and who denies it each week. That's the point I was trying to make (shame I had to spell it out for some of you). We all have our opinions but this is mine and, just as I would leave a partner who only hurt me and gave me no pleasure, I am leaving my team. It's not about finding another team or being weak orbeing a woman and by implication knowing nothing about football, it's about finding peace. Disagree all you wish but don't accuse me of being a glory seeker or, worse still as someone did, illiterate. - Post No. 31759


Graham Simons  10:27am 5th Dec 2012

It was a bit difficult to attack George Graham though wasn't it? His record reads: 87 league cup winners 88 nothing 89 champions 90 nothing 91 champions 92 nothing 93 fa cup and league cup winners 94 cup winners cup winners 95 sacked. Under Wenger we've gone more seasons with trophies than with them - Post No. 31768


Brian  10:49am 5th Dec 2012

"love is unconditional" but when love is not returned or spurned what is the partner to do? Our unconditional love is being taken for granted by a greedy money hungry majority owner. Sporting organisations in many countries have a not for profit status with their tax departments. Regardless of the "millstone" of the stadium the sheer size of the profits and the lack of additional spending in football department says to me we are being taken for mugs. I have found myself agreeing with the BSM. - Post No. 31771


Joe S.  12:38pm 5th Dec 2012

DB! Don't Go. Regardless of theAKBs there will be an Arsenal yocan once again believe in. - Post No. 31779


loyal since 1980  12:43pm 5th Dec 2012

Good bye and good riddence! - Post No. 31781


Fozzy  13:28pm 5th Dec 2012

Deb, Your brilliant piece has filled me with tears. I was questioning my relationship with The Arse, which celebrates its 50th anniversary next week, inside The Rampant Cock on Highbury Corner, after last Saturday's game. To me, it felt the other way round, that I had been dumped by an old girlfriend who I had always loved. I asked the friend who I took along to watch the debacle if she thought it was all over. She comforted me and said that it's not all over, it's just that the relationship was going through a bad time. Those words made me feel better. - Post No. 31785


Jack  13:29pm 5th Dec 2012

Charlie Nich's great whenever I seem him on tv he always bigs up Arsenal I believe he even prefers us to Celtic. Frank Mclintock I know is a far bigger Arsenal player and a great guy but Talk Sport use him as a doom munger whenever Arsenal are struggling. In Arsene We Trust is 100% correct you people just don't see the bigger picture. I too was behind GG,TN and even Don Howe right to the end. It's called supporting a club you respect and trust. Not just looking for the quick fix. - Post No. 31786


Andy  14:02pm 5th Dec 2012

I started supporting the Arsenal before this. 17 years at that point without a trophy. Since then through thick and thin, I have followed the arsenal, but this year saw the greatest moment of my Arsenal life. Mo Farrah is a gooner. No other club can say that Mo Farrah is a gooner. - Post No. 31790


Ken Dodd  14:03pm 5th Dec 2012

By jove,by jove what a beautiful day to jump into my time machine,fly back to London Colney in September '96 and introduce Arsene to Seaman,Lukic,Dixon,Winterburn,Bould, Keown,Adams,Linighan,Platt,Wright,Merson,Bergkamp and Parlour.Then a quick hop to Highbury to marvel at the art deco stands and bulging trophy cabinet....... - Post No. 31791


Lord Buddha enlightened  19:17pm 5th Dec 2012

I've been in contemplation about Arsenal for a while now, and have suddenly reached Nirvana with this thought: Wenger out. Peace and tranquility again.... - Post No. 31811


mark from aylesbury  19:46pm 5th Dec 2012

In Arsenal we trust, I really do scratch my head when reading your articles. Strange comments ranging from classing people in social economic groups to constant attacks about whingers, ingrates and you say we are bitter? What I dont see from you is a structured arguament. I wonder if you fear change? - Post No. 31813


Wombledin  20:17pm 5th Dec 2012

How about just staying friends with benefits for now? - Post No. 31815


Goonergirl  20:43pm 5th Dec 2012

I can't believe how many patronising and sexist blokes chose to comment on this article, picking up on Deb's gender and attacking that rather than actually reading what she said. Shame on you and if all you have to say is 'bye' or other equally facile remarks, then I despair. Read what she was trying to say - she's hurting at what her beloved team have become, she never said she only wanted trophies, after all, the seventies and early eighties were hardly trophy laden years. She said she wanted an Arsenal team that showed commitment and guts and passion not the spineless, gutless mercenaries that currently wear the shirt. Jeeeeez. if you can't see that then you are all blinded. - Post No. 31818


Tony Evans  8:17am 6th Dec 2012

Well said Goonergirl - I thought some of the replies to Deb's heartfelt article were shocking and lacked any understanding of what she was saying. - Post No. 31826


In Arsene We Trust  9:39am 6th Dec 2012

@mark from aylesbury: you're having a laugh if you think I'm bitter like you anti-Wenger brigade. I'm not the one abusing a man who has given so much for the club and poisoning people's minds with their negativity. Some of you lot even go as far as wanting the club to lose matches, because it might have a slight chance that the man you hate so much will get the sack. You lot should look in the mirror before calling someone bitter. I don't fear change, but I find it amusing you "Wenger Out" rabble think it's so easy to manage a football like the armchair managers you people really are. Wanting ridiculous requests like bringing in overrated managers and wanting to spend millions on players that will put Arsenal into further debt. Anyway, another one bites the dust, Chelsea is out of the Champions League. It's funny cause a lot you WOB want Arsenal to be like Chelsea with their big spending and constant changing of managers. You lot should be proud that Arsenal managed to make it to the knockout stage and praise Wenger for getting us there. Arsene knows best. @Goonergirl: the only mercenaries in the club were the likes of Nasri, Adebayor and RVP, who the WOB still worships, even though he back stabbed the club and Wenger, the man that made him the player he is today. Walcott will be added in that list, if he doesn't sign soon. - Post No. 31828


tony  12:48pm 6th Dec 2012

Arsenalís doom and gloom, manufactured and spread by the Anti-Arsenal Arsenal, with their allies in the press, has gone further up the scale this week. Sagna has apparently been offered only a one-year extension to his current contract, which takes him up to the age of 32. Heís clearly a great player, and it would be a shame to see him go, but weíve been down this road before. If he goes at the end of his contract, everyone screams that another player is on the way out. If he stays, but his ability declines because of his age, everyone screams that his salary is a waste of money, and points out how big our salary bill is. The AAA will then recite the litany of Cesc Fabregas, Samir Nasri, GaŽl Clichy, Robert Van Persie and Alex Song. More concerning is the lack of news on Walcott, who has rejected a five-year deal worth £75,000 a week. One argument that seems to have fallen away is that ďif we give in to this deal, everyone will want the sameĒ. Everyone wants more and more, despite FFP and the 25 rule and the possible Premier League Financial rules that have been proposed. If Theo really wants to play centre forward, guaranteed, does he really think that other clubs would go for that? If they do then the managerís position becomes pointless since the players committee can actually pick their own team. Being away yesterday I have not heard if Tomas Rosicky came off on Tuesday as a precaution, easing him back from a long injury, or if there was something wrong with him. I guess we will see on Saturday. So doom and gloom at around 8/10 (with 10 being the max) at Arsenal among those who like to look for negatives. What about Chelsea then. New unwanted manager, big score last night, uninspiring league games, out of the Champions League and a lot of talk about the spine of their team not being right. First Champions League Champions to go out in the group stages. Or come to that Man City Ė finishing bottom of their group and not even making it into the Europa League. Doom and gloom there? The problem for Man City is that the country that owns the club have expectations that are primarily insane (given that to some degree football is a game of chance and luck as well as skill). Retain the Premier League and do well in the Champions League. So those who own recognise a 50% failure rate already. It is the championship or every chance that the manager will go. And the manager kept on buying through the summer to strengthen the squad. At least Arsenal fans can believe that if only we had bought more we would be higher up the league (as well as in being where Man City are not Ė in the last 16). There is also the fact that it is widely thought that van Persie, MartŪnez, Hazzard and de Rossi, were going to Man City, but they went elsewhere. Even the billions canít buy everything. There is also the point that while Arsenal has never won the Champions League we have been to the final, but Man Cityís manager has never got past the quarter finals. And while Arsenal focus on the players who have left our club, let us not forget that they lost de Jong. OK, just one player, but an important player in my personal view. As for Chelsea they have the Europa League to play in but I donít sense harmony in the camp despite Torres scoring a couple. BenŪtez is not everyoneís cup of tea Ė largely because he seems to have no humility, no sense of humour, nothing that makes him likeable. He has said that Lampard and Cole will be out soon Ė which isnít really the motivation one normally gives players. The problem is that the crowd donít much like him, he wasnít the ownerís first choice, heís a stop-gap, and I wonder if the players actually like him much. He maybe can persuade the players to play a bit differently, but thatís about it, which is not much for a top manager. . He looks like the wrong manager at the wrong club to me. Of course I am an Arsenal fan, so my judgement of Chelsea is always biased, but the managerís position at Chelsea looks to me the biggest problem of all. . Of course Arsenal have problems; I know I was there last saturday and stayed to the very end. But somehow, perhaps because of belief, or passion, or love for the club or plain daftness, I still think over the next ten years, our problems are nothing to those of Man City and Chelsea. Man Cityís time will pass once the country that owns them has done its world cup thing. Chelsea will finally run out of managers to buy and sack. . Just a thought. - Post No. 31842


mark from aylesbury  13:45pm 6th Dec 2012

In Arsenal we trust , Oh so we are rabble now. Ill add that to the list. I think you are very angry with the world. What battle will you fight when Wenger is gone - Post No. 31855


Hellenic Gooner  14:02pm 6th Dec 2012

I think the majority of the responses missed the point of the article altogether.The writer is not a glory hunter,as she mentions in the article,she supported our great club through the horrible years 1972-1988 when the best we could hope was to win the Pre season Makita International Trophy at Wembley (older readers will remember we once beat Spurs 5-0 for the Makita Trophy).It is precisely because she loves the Arsenal that she cannot watch this team struggle against mighty football powers like Swansea,Norwich,Olympiakos etc.Let's be honest we all know we are not going to win anything and we have accepted it but it is the waffle that comes out of Gazidis'and Wenger's mouths that makes doubt whether these people should be where they are.It does not matter one jot whether Deb wants a divorce from Arsenal,just read the article and ask yourselves:Does she have a point? - Post No. 31859


HowardL  21:08pm 6th Dec 2012

Well written article, Deb. As a fellow longstanding supporter I understand exactly how you feel. I'll continue to go to games but it doesn't make sense to continually expose yourself knowingly to pain and embarrassment - and pay for the privilege in addition! - Post No. 31892


In Arsene We Trust  12:10pm 7th Dec 2012

@mark from aylesbury: why don't you add "egomaniac" in your list? LOL. If you think hating you "anti-Wenger" brigade mean hating the world. You lot are in the minority, a tiny yet very loud group, Just letting you know that being the loudest doesn't mean you are right like some blowhard pundit i.e. Piers Morgan likes to believe. It's just that websites likes these like to indulge you lot, maybe it's because of fear, I don't know, but that's a discussion for another day. Btw, I don't hate you lot, it's more pity than hate. Must be sad that you lot wishing the club to lose. If you turn your back and abuse a manager who has given so much to your fav... former favourite club, can't imagine what you lot will do your relatives and friends. I mean, two-faced person, isn't all trustworthy, do you say? - Post No. 31918


mark from aylesbury  19:49pm 8th Dec 2012

how i treat my relatives? i think ill make this my last reply to you as you have gone beyond reason! - Post No. 31952


Issue #244 - Out Now!

Gooner Editorial

1st September 2014

And Leicester!

Online Ed: Arsenal fail to overcome Premier League new boys

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